Not My Usual Haunts
Long time no see.
After months of chilly silence, I’m back, and I’m not in a place where I’d expect to find myself.
A shady alley in Pattaya. Mid-afternoon. The bar girls are getting warmed up, staking out the front seats of the bars, but not yet committed enough to switch from socks and flipflops to heels.
Anyone who’s looking for company in the unforgiving light of 3pm is not going to judge you on your crocs. Keep your powder dry and your bunions comfortable.

I count myself among the fortunate, however, for I have no bunions. My dirt biking boots are ergonomic and I have been out plying my trade in full body armour, with hydrocarbons in my nostrils.
We must each make a living, and I’ve been out on the mountains making mine.
Here’s what I do.
0400 to 0500: Wake. Coffee. Emails, admin, marketing, customer care. Sell enduro tours, sell dirt bike parts, take hotel bookings.
0620: The tour customers are awake. Go to make sure they have coffee, tea and a good view of the sunrise.

0700-2200: Make sure everyone has an amazing time. How’s your bike? Do you need a tie down strap? You’re stuck on a root, I need you to roll that rear wheel back for me and then hit the root with momentum. Don’t pick up that bike on your own, let me help so you don’t get tired. Drop your revs through this section, you’re losing traction. Stop and drink these electrolytes for me. Bite this wild tamarind before you taste that moonshine, it will make it all the sweeter.

2200-0400: Sleep like a dead thing.
It’s a good life. It’s a full life. It may be why I haven’t answered your email.
So why the hell am I in Pattaya? Because I needed a break, I found myself in Chonburi, and I went to the beach. I bought a coconut, laid in the sun, was happy. You don’t have to overcomplicate things.

In the next few days I’ll migrate through Bangkok and even further south to the islands… and then maybe I’ll have time to really tell you some stories.
Because, lawdy, things have happened.